Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
