Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
