Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
