They should really pass out barf bags in church
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
