Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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