We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
