Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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