You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize