I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
