Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
