I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
