one two three fourrrrnication!
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
What happened to fro yo and sex?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
