We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
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