so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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