summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
