then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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