Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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