Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize