So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize