forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize