Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
