So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize