So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
