No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
