just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
