The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
