is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
