At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
