OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
