ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
they're like a gay fantastic four
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
