so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I think pants incapable of making pants work
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
