Christians are straight up FREAKS
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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