So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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