I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
This is my gift to your gina
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
