I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
