is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
