But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize
