I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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