I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
