hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
