its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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