oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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