How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We are two peas in an std pod
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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