sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
