she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
