after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
MIDGETS
????
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
