You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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