my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
