Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
