Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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